Why would you need to return the merchandise? Are you ashamed of what you are now apart of? Are you no longer sad, drunk and lonely my friend? If you find yourself slowly teetering towards the brighter end of the spectrum, don't give up the product. Keep it as a reminder of your progress, or give it to a friend who can now take your place. But this about returns.. I guess if you buy it and can't embody what the merch represents you have 72 hours after delivery to meal about it and return for full refund. Sounds good to me.